Capitol One Bowl: PSU vs. LSU

Capitol One Bowl

Robert Guliano on Why Penn State will win: First of all, Capitol One’s ad campaign never fails to baffle me. They run on the slogan “No Hassles.” I’m no social economist, but isn’t credit card debt one of the biggest financial hassles for Americans today. Maybe it should be “No Hassles Until You’re Neck Deep in Credit Card Debt.” And I can’t imagine anything about their commercials is encouraging to Americans plummeting deeper and deeper in the red. I don’t hear anyone saying, “Good thing my debt is with Capitol One! They’ll just send a herd of hairy Nordic vikings to my rescue. Then, they ask “What’s in your wallet?” Try nothing, asshole. Anyway, the game should be a classic New Years battle. I have developed an intricate theory that I like to elegantly interpret by saying: Joe Paterno is too old to lose. I have decided from 2010 on, beating Paterno would be like invading Haiti. You would just feel bad.

Penn State Key Players:

3. Evan Royster- Over 1,000 rushing yards, under 200 carries. No need to do the math, take it from me he’s good.

2. Darryl Clark- Let’s just say if he got injured leading up to Fridays game JoePa would lock himself in an electrical closet. Clark finishes a tremendous career.

1. Joe Paterno- I like to refer to him as Pennsylvania Moses. College Station should be renamed “Joe.” This would effectively locate Penn State University in the city of Joe, PA.

Brandon Hickey on why LSU will win: Finally! A good game! LSU comes into the Capital One Bowl at 9-3 and ranked 13^th. The three losses were in close games against Florida, Alabama and Ole Miss. LSU is a pretty boring team looking at the statistics. Quarterback Jordan Jefferson doesn’t have 2,000 yards passing. The top two running backs have 500 and 300 yards respectively and both have only 4 touchdowns. Brandon LaFell is kinda good. So let’s take a look at the three favorites in the Capital One Mascot Challenge.

Mascot Challenge mascots to Watch:

3. Sebastian the Ibis (Miami)-His name is Sebastian and he’s an Ibis. What’s not awesome about that?

2. Jack Rabbit (South Dakota State)-A spitting image of Bugs Bunny. The kids and grownups alike will love him.

1. Big Red (Western Kentucky) - Nobody knows what a hilltopper is and nobody knows what Big Red is. That’s what makes him awesome. Plus he ate Jim Kelly’s Hall of Fame jacket on Sportscenter.

THE COMPROMISE: Pennsylvania Moses leads the lions to the land of milk and honey, 17-13 Penn State.